Geplaatst in Personal

Porn

For years I never understood what my grandma meant by ‘keep your hands on the blanket’ when she tugged me in.

My parents both grew up in a devout Catholic family. Unlike their parents who were very puritanical, my parents were extremely liberale.

I must have been at about age 10 when my mom gave me a book on sex education with real life photos. As I recall there were photos of the process on how the male and female body matures, teens having intercourse and what shocked me the most was a picture of a young boy who uses his erection as a coat hook.

My first contact with pornography was when my cousins and I found a huge pile of porn magazines stacked in a container behind a dorm. When our parents found out they explained that what we saw in the magazines was not an act of love between two people.

These days most children get exposed to online pornography in their early teenage years, either because they are curious or accidentally when they view material on the Internet.

Browsing the internet, except for Dutch sites, I only read articles on porn addition. That might be a problem, but my biggest concern is that porn distorts the perception of reality. Do we want teenage boys feel inadequate and dismissive of women and their desires? Inadequate because they think they would be better bed partners if they have a bigger penis that stays erected for a long time and that they have to humiliate a woman. And what about our girls? Do we want them to think that sex is all about the man’s pleasure and less about hitting their erogenous zones. Worse still they feel obligated to have anal sex, oral sex ending in ejaculated on their face, be strangled or to be shared between partner’s friends while screaming and moan in pleasure because that’s how it should be.

It is not possible to fully protect our children from exposure to pornography, but we can teach them where lovemaking is all about. -by Bregje

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